“If you’re comfortable communicating with each other, even to the point of saying, ‘My needs aren’t being met this month, we need to pick it up,’ I think that’s a good sexual relationship,” says Jodi Sirota, a therapist at Calgary’s Hersh Center for Sexual Wellness.
Not comfortable having those kinds of discussions? It might be the first thing you need to work on. One strategy Forbes-Robert suggests to make things easier is to read something titillating, whether together or separately, and share your favourite scenes. “Erotica can be a great way to find new things that your partner enjoys.”