Rather than surprising your partner with a new collection of sex toys, both Forbes-Robert and Sirota recommend exploring what’s out there together. “We recommend conversation first rather than surprising someone,” Forbes-Robert says.
Instead of handcuffs, for instance, you might give them a gift certificate to a sex shop, whether you intend to go in person or shop online. “You never know what you’re going to like and what you’re going to see,” says Sirota. “Go with your partner and ask, ‘What do you think it is – do you think you’d like that?’ If there’s something new, there’s a whole other world.”